Read the First Ever Lily Press Chat Log

Naomi Joy says:
Good evening, Emma

Emma says:
Hello, Naomi!

Naomi Joy says:
We are here tonight to chat about "Building Skills," along with Mrs. Valine, my dear mother, who will offer her comments.

Naomi Joy says:
Shall we begin by discussing why building skills is important and then move on to discuss various areas of skill building and how to go about building those skills?

Emma says:
Sure...

Naomi Joy says:
So, why should we build skills? Why not be young, have fun, and drink Pepsi?

Naomi Joy says:
(Psstt...you're supposed to answer)

Emma says:
(Working on it, hold on...)

Emma says:
I think that is part of everyone's lives as Christians...

Emma says:
Wanna get a little more specific?

Mrs. Valine says:
I'm amazed at how many people do not have excellence as their goal.

Emma says:
How do you mean?

Mrs. Valine says:
Today you have you to make a birthday cake. Why don't you want to make the best birthday cake you possibly can? When you eat a great cake at someone else's house, why don't you get the recipe? Why don't you take a cake decorating class? I just don't understand people who are satisfied with mediocrity.

Emma says:
So...you are talking about something beyond just "doing the best we can"?

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, I think we should always strive to be better than we are.

Naomi Joy says:
People sometimes use "this is the best I can do" as a cop-out for not getting any better.

Emma says:
True, but I believe there is a place where you have peace because you have done your best, and you know you can rest in that.

Emma says:
But I know what you're saying.

Naomi Joy says:
Right, I agree.

Naomi Joy says:
But

Naomi Joy says:
That's good as long as our goal is to do things well

Naomi Joy says:
And we are truly doing our best

Emma says:
My dad often brings up the concept of "good" and "better"

Naomi Joy says:
Because we are supposed to do everything to the glory of God, right? And work at it with all our hearts? That would mean not being satisfied with half-baked work if we know we can do better. At least, that's what I tell my piano students.

Emma says:
(Yes, I agree with you.)

Mrs. Valine says:
There is a big philosophical difference between "my best" and "good enough".

Mrs. Valine says:
I know the two of you....you are both in the habit of doing your best.

Mrs. Valine says:
And back to the cake thing

Emma says:
Great, I love cake.

Mrs. Valine says:
This may not be the season for growing in your cake skills...but it should always be the season for growing in something.

Emma says:
I think it always comes back to: Imitate Christ.

Naomi Joy says:
Okay, so we should work to build skills that are of use both now and in the future because that glorifies God and enables us to serve Him better and in more ways.

Emma says:
Yes...and an added bonus is the part about "enjoying Him forever" and the happiness that is found there

Mrs. Valine says:
I think it would be easy to pass this subject quickly, but I think a lot of girls have not thought about this.

Emma says:
Amen to that one...at least speaking for myself.

Mrs. Valine says:
It goes back to home-schooling, which is where many of our readers have come from.

Mrs. Valine says:
Was home-schooling something you did between eight and three or was all of life a learning experience?

Mrs. Valine says:
Did you expect to be done after graduation, or did you plan to continue learning as long as you live?

Emma says:
Mom and Dad like to tell people that I'm still home-schooled.

Naomi Joy says:
I think some people think that all they need to know is how to do dishes and take care of children, but there is so much more involved in being a godly woman - skill wise and otherwise

Emma says:
Technically I graduated from twelfth grade three years ago. But I am still learning.

Naomi Joy says:
Right - me too.

Naomi Joy says:
Which brings us to our next point - what exactly do we need to know?

Emma says:
Well, the dishes and the child care is a good part of it. I would definitely say that's helpful!

Emma says:
But it's not the most necessary.

Naomi Joy says:
Right

Emma says:
We need to know how to give up our lives daily.

Naomi Joy says:
I think there are multiple things we are building skills for. #1 - a possible future home

Naomi Joy says:
#2 - the possibility of raising children (either our own or others)

Naomi Joy says:
#3 - service in the church and community now

Naomi Joy says:
#4 - service in our own homes

Naomi Joy says:
Did I miss anything?

Emma says:
Ha.

Naomi Joy says:
We can't say we are only building skills for the future, because most (if not all) of them are useful now and whether we are married or not

Emma says:
Honestly I rarely think of pursuing skills especially for my "someday" home...

Mrs. Valine says:
The skills you really need to work on are the ones that are needed now

Emma says:
Right...

Mrs. Valine says:
Someone is sick....what should you do?

Mrs. Valine says:
Our garden needs tending...what can we learn to make those flowers grow more luscious than they did last year?

Emma says:
Everything that I can think of needing to know in preparation for that home is also something I need to be learning for use in my home and situation now...

Mrs. Valine says:
It all requires reading, study, and hands on work and not a bit of it is wasted....everything you learn will be valuable next year and every year after that...and possibly while you are visiting a sick acquaintance you can go out and make a little progress in her yard as well.

Naomi Joy says:
Okay, to summarize so far, we need to build our skills to be useful now and not just later.

Emma says:
I even think we sometimes tend to put too much emphasis on later...

Emma says:
and forget the now.

Naomi Joy says:
Right, I agree

Naomi Joy says:
So what are some skills you and I have worked on recently?

Emma says:
Scrubbies.

Naomi Joy says:
Are you making scrubbies?

Emma says:
Mostly you. Hahahaha.

Naomi Joy says:
That would go on the list of "Projects Naomi is trying to convince
Emma to do"

Emma says:
Hey, I got you the directions. Okaaaay...tatting, then.

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, I have been making dish scrubbies out of tulle. We'll probably put those directions and a picture of some on the Lily Press site.

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, tatting.

Naomi Joy says:
That's on the list of "Projects Emma is trying to get Naomi to do"

Naomi Joy says:
The difference being, Naomi is actually DOING THEM.

Naomi Joy says:
ha ha

Emma says:
Hay. Be gentle.

Naomi Joy says:
We won't go into the "Books Naomi is trying to get Emma to Read" or "Books Emma is trying to get Naomi to Read"

Emma says:
Work on that attitude, sister!

Emma says:
Yeah, we could be here all night.

Naomi Joy says:
And we'll totally avoid the list of "Books Mrs. Valine is trying to get Naomi and Emma not to Read Together Over the Phone"

Naomi Joy says:
Okay, anyway, tatting

Emma says:
Yes.

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, I tried desperately to shuttle tat months ago to no avail.

Naomi Joy says:
So you taught me how to needle tat instead and so far I am on my third bookmark.

Emma says:
We even tried together in the Suburban.

Naomi Joy says:
Okay, there's the basic sewing skills

Naomi Joy says:
We need to know how to mend clothing, sew children's clothing (I need to try taking apart some adult clothes and making children's out of them), etc.

Emma says:
Weeeeelll....

Emma says:
can I make you mad for a sec?

Naomi Joy says:
Well, that depends

Emma says:
I think it would be nice to know that

Emma says:
and helpful to know that

Emma says:
but...

Emma says:
I don't think we need to know it...

Emma says:
know what I mean?

Naomi Joy says:
Yes

Naomi Joy says:
My mom was just saying something about that. Does every girl need to know how to sew?

Emma says:
Um, I say no.

Emma says:
Are you mad yet?

Naomi Joy says:
No

Mrs. Valine says:
I say every girl doesn't need to sew, but every girl needs to do the basic sewing things that would be required in a home - sew on buttons, repair seams and holes (patching).

Emma says:
Well...I somewhat agree, but I still don't think even knowing how to do those jobs is mandatory.

Mrs. Valine says:
Martha had a tear in a $45 brand new corduroy shirt awhile back and one of our friends' grandmothers did an unbelievable job of darning that hole. It was beyond my skill, but we needed that skill.

Naomi Joy says:
That's part of being a good steward, I think - knowing basic things that will help you to take care of what you have

Emma says:
Yes, I think they are great things to learn.

Mrs. Valine says:
Nobody HAS to know anything. The question is - you have time; learn something.

Emma says:
I hope I can teach my daughters those things someday.

Naomi Joy says:
Me too

Naomi Joy says:
You do know how to sew on a button, don't you Emma?

Emma says:
lol Yes.

Naomi Joy says:
Good

Naomi Joy says:
Just making sure that was a hypothetical argument you were giving

Naomi Joy says:
I worked a lot year before last on sewing children's clothes.

Naomi Joy says:
I would like to get back to that.

Emma says:
Me too...I bought a pleater and tried to get into the whole smocking deal.

Emma says:
Very fun stuff.

Emma says:
Then I needed my time for other things.

Naomi Joy says:
Sometimes these days, sewing adult clothes or even bigger kids' clothes is not cheaper than buying them. Which isn't to say it might not be necessary anyway for modesty's sake. But for baby clothes and toddler's clothes it is often still cheaper to sew

Naomi Joy says:
I would love to be able to smock

Emma says:
I would love to have time to smock!

Emma says:
And I hope I'll be able to again someday soon...

Emma says:
And Naomi has a good point about the economy...

Emma says:
it's often just as expensive to sew something as it is to buy it.

Emma says:
Which doesn't rule it out, but adds more to the equation.

Mrs. Valine says:
I think you girls are being too practical. There are reasons to do things besides money.

Mrs. Valine says:
I enjoy an old video someone made of my kids when there were only three of them. Naomi is asked , "Where did you get your pretty dress?" She smiles, smirks, and says, "Mine mom made it". The interviewer says, "She must love you a lot". Naomi answers with a smile.

Naomi Joy says:
Aughh...yes, once I, too, used bad grammar. ha ha

Emma says:
How did I miss seeing that video?

Mrs. Valine says:
I have put away the pattern for a kitty cat that Hannah loved so I can make them for her children. I firmly believe that using those sewing skills was part raising my children in God's ways. They felt loved.

Mrs. Valine says:
special...

Mrs. Valine says:
Part of the family...worth taking time for

Mrs. Valine says:
That is much more reason for developing these skills than money.

Mrs. Valine says:
The same goes for your husbands...I had to laugh at Micah this week

Mrs. Valine says:
Martha had been cooking and cleaning all day for him and he just wanted her to sit down and rest.

Mrs. Valine says:
He made her an ice cream sundae and even put little chocolate swirls on the plate like she would have done.

Emma says:
lol

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, I was just going to say - this is the same reason why we need to take time to make beautiful and good-tasting food and present it in a way that looks nice.

Naomi Joy says:
The table should be set nicely, the place settings match, perhaps a candle or two

Emma says:
Just your friendly devil's advocate butting in here...

Emma says:
Yes, I think we should strive for all of those things

Naomi Joy says:
all to create an environment of well-being, peace, and happiness to make our children (and us) secure and joyful.

Emma says:
And also...for myself...strive for the character to be able to work toward those things...

Emma says:
and not flip out if my dinner plans don't come off perfectly.

Naomi Joy says:
Well, you're a perfectionist, Emma

Emma says:
I'm the type that would soon be taking out my "failure" on my husband and children.

Naomi Joy says:
We're talking goals here, not hard and fast rules.

Emma says:
And that would be tearing down my house with my hands...

Naomi Joy says:
Your children aren't going to not feel loved if your plates don't match the tablecloth.

Emma says:
K. Just checking. I said I was a friendly devil's advocate.

Naomi Joy says:
Ha ha

Emma says:
Nice double negative.

Emma says:
I didn't not like it.

Mrs. Valine says:
I don't think you are getting my point

Mrs. Valine says:
We serve our families....I sewed kitties, dresses, and whatever....Martha cleans and cooks for her brother...and it draws love out of them...and that love draws them to the Lord

Mrs. Valine says:
I don't think my children follow God because we had great devotions...

Mrs. Valine says:
If that's not the motivation, you can't come up with any viable justification for tatting, knitting, decorating...or even Chinese cooking....our goal is to spur our families on in their spiritual walks by our service to them

Mrs. Valine says:
I think they have lived a life of responding with love to those who love them and it naturally led them to respond with love to a God who loved them.

Emma says:
I think I probably agree with you on that...

Emma says:
"my life for yours"

Emma says:
Hey...

Emma says:
Isn't there a book you ladies read..

Emma says:
the Edith Schaeffer one?

Emma says:
Could you maybe summarize some of the biggest things that you learned from her book?

Naomi Joy says:
Yes, that's the same thing Edith Schaeffer talks about in The Hidden Art of Homemaking. I think we have a review of that on the Lily Press site already.

Emma says:
Ahhh, I should read it.

Naomi Joy says:
Well, this is probably 27 pages long now.

Naomi Joy says:
Perhaps we should end for now. Would you be up to doing a "part 2" some other time?

Naomi Joy says:
Maybe someone else wants to join us for the part 2

Emma says:
Either option would be swell

Naomi Joy says:
Okay

Naomi Joy says:
Well, thank you Emma

Emma says:
Nice talking with you ladies!